Time Magazine's Top 10 Shit

Anyway, Time Magazine has the top ten of everything and I have some tl;dr's for you, the faithful reader of the infinite steez blog. I had initially planned to correct all of their mistakes, but instead have opted to do so for only the most glaring errors

#1 Best Awkward Moment-- Bush Dances Awkwardly
WRONG-- the most awkward moment was actually when the self-checking machine refused to ring up something awkward that I was buying at Ralphs. Picking Something of more mass appeal... might be the already posted video where nobody will let Bush in line. ID.

#1 Best Business Deal-- Some Shit About Visa Wrong-- The best business deal was when I got a 30 pack of caguama's for $16. Booyah

#1 Best Movie Performance-- Kate Winslet is some movie you've never heard of.
Wrong again fucko! It was, of course Robert Downey Jr. in Tropic Thunder. Heath Ledger caswe a close second for Dark Knight.












#1 Best Break-Up-- Guy Ritchie & Madonna
WRONG! The right answer was the breakup between Time magazine and journalistic relevance. Although I feel like this might have happened a bit close to press time, as posting a 'best break-up' section, was the final nail in the coffin. Second place, goes to my roommate and his HEINOUS BITCH girlfriend.

#1 Best in Campaign Gaffes-- McCain's Weak Fundamentals
Wrong, the biggest Gaffe was:
Making Palin VP
Nom making McCain presidential Nominee
The Republican Party bothering to run any candidate.

#1 Best in Science-- The Large Hadron Collider
Hell yes, in terms of science, Time magazine knows where it's it, briefly profiling the epicly important LHC.
See, The Onion knows where it's at too.

#1 Best in Video-- The Couric/ Palin Interviews
WRONG! This was by no means even the best Palin Video, that was Nailin' Paylin. (although it's MUCH better with the pr0n. No, the best video of the year was this one:



Brought to my attentnion by Raisins at The Internet is Terrible, this is probably the most haunting thing in history, and 2008's most significant vid.

#1 Best in Children's Books-- Some Shit By The Folks Who Wrote Burglar Bill

WRONG! The best children's book is this one, which teaches children of all ages about Bob Dylan. Actually I don't care.

#1 Best in Crime-- OJ gets thrown in the slammer.

WRONG! The best crime story was me getting a speeding ticket. Fuck.

#1 Best in Editorial Cartoons-- Some non lulzy shit about the bailout.

WRONG! The real best comes from Jim Kelly, over at the Onion, sticking it to those environmentalist wingnuts.

#1 Best in Election Photos: Some stupid Obama picture

Wrong. There were a shit ton of epic pictures of my fucking hero Barack Obama, I have no idea why they picked such a lame one. In my opinion fact the best election pictures were taken by some rando chick called Nilda Vidutis. You should probs take a look at this amazing series of photos.


#1 Best in Video Games-- GTA IV
WRONG!! The best video game of 2008 was fucking metal gear solid 4, and the fact that it doesn't even crack their top 10 shows that Time knows dick about video games. I didn't even play Metal Gear Solid and I know it was the best. I did play GTA, and I thought it was great but come on. Metal Gear is probably dank as shit.

#1 Best in Fashon Moments-- Something Lame About High Heels
WRONG-- The best moment in 2008 fashion was when I got those epic Clae Shoes. Love those fucking things.

#1 Best in Olympics-- Phelp's Phucking Photo Phinish
Wrong-- the correct answer is, "who fucking cares?" Partial credit would be given for me getting some action while the Olympics were on TV.

#1 Best in Religion-- Some shit nobody cares about

Wrong, the correct answer is I AM A FALSE PROHPHET AND GOD IS A SUPERSTITION. NOW GIVE ME THE BLOOD ELI, LET ME GET AWAY.

#1 Best in Sports Moments-- Tiger plays through the pain.

Yeah fucking right. The best sports story of the year was when this dude playing for some no name college team broke his finger and was told he couldn't play. His response-- fuck you, cut off my finger, we're doin' it live! Maybe Tiger would top this list if he'd opted to have his goddamn leg cut off to play better. Are you fucking kidding me?

Alright, that's about all I have the attention span for. Fuck off.

Culture: Hope Poster Round-Up

Politics aside, I think that Shepard Fairey's 'Hope' and 'Change' (Progress was really weak) posters were extremely important culturally speaking. Fairey, who spent the past like 10 years doing the same thing (though extremely well--Obey Giant is always cool) achieved an unprecedented level of notoriety for his iconic images of My Fucking Hero Barack Obama. In honor of that, here are a bunch of epic internets revisions. I have selected a few of my faves, not on political lines but based on creativity, humor and technical proficiency.





















































All images were found on encyclopedia dramatica, 4chan.org, and this place, which has a great selection of these images. That last one, poster place, has links to the original artists who did this baller work. I actually made one of that broad I get around with for her birthday, so I know the amount of effort that goes into making even a simple image, so bravo to all you internet geniuses.

Culture: Being Rich

Must be great...


EVERYDAY I'M HUSTLIN'
EVERYDAY I'M HUSTLIN'
EVERYDAY I'M HUSTLIN'
EVERYDAY I'M HUSTLIN'
EVERYDAY I'M HUSTLIN'
EVERYDAY I'M HUSTLIN'
EVERYDAY I'M HUSTLIN'
EVERYDAY I'M HUSTLIN'
EVERYDAY I'M HUSTLIN'
EVERYDAY I'M HUSTLIN'

Gut Reactions: US Journalists need to step their game up.

Alright, so if you haven't seen the greatest shit in history, here it is:



my fucking hero Barack Obama Some Iraqi Journo pitches not one but two shoes at Pres. Bush. Way to go Iraqi Journalist! We all know that Bush is a douche etc, etc, no need to get into that, but way to go. I feel like a lot of people are making this out to be a bad thing, but it isn't. America has clearly fallen down in the world's opinion to the point people think they can just throw shoes at our dignitaries, and that's kind of our bad. Actually, no, it's George Bush's bad for being such a douche.

I just changed my mind what this blog post is gonna be about. It was going to be all about how US journalists need to start being assholes if they don't want their newspapers to get shut down, but now I'm going to present you with a collection of videos of bush being pwned and disregarded.


No Handshakes for Bush:



What's that you say? This story was later debunked? WHO CARES? My point stands, moving on...

No waving for Bush:



Way to go, Keith Olberman, what an asskicker.

No space for Bush:



Good good. I mean, you can talk about America's declining stature in the world, or you can simply lol at the fact that 'The Leader of the Free World' has become such a non-entity. I advocate the lulz. Some argue that this is because Bush is a Lame Duck Douche President, but I disagree. I think it's because he has fucked a lot of shit up, and some people, unlike me, do not feel the constant pressure to conform to standards of politeness. We all like to think we'd have the courage to stand up to slavery or call Condi Rice a murderer to her face but in reality, most of us just want to be nice. At least I do. So bravo to people who are brave enough to be deliberately rude, or to throw shoes, or whatever the fuck this post was originally about. Okay, no more politics for at least 5 more posts.

Ace out.

PSA: Free Illegal Anime Online

Apparently, you can watch all the free fucking anime online you want. Not literally fucking anime, that would be hentai, and you can probably find that free too, but you can read about that type of thing on my other site, The Niche Pornography Blog. Anywy, more importantly you can watch dragonball z for free online. If you don't like dragon ball, then fuck off, but if you do, you can see that shit, along with lots of other weird shit from overseas for free, quasi-illegally at http://animecrusade.com.

Enjoy.

Steez: Transformer Shoes versus Transformer Shoes

Check this shit out!













Boom! Normally I'd write some kind of cutesy copy here but nothing I can do will top these baller shoes. Fuck. How epic. I mean, I thought this was cool:








But holy balls! I feel like the second option has the advantage of actually being shoes, but the first one is truly a robot in disguise. H-F-S! I mean, I'd have to catagorize this as shit that will not get you fucked, but only just. I feel like these kicks will at least get you some tang in the geek chick set, so you can get all the transformers tang you want. Fuck. Love me some shoes.

WHAT NOW MOTHERFUCKER?

Gut Reactions: Global Schwarming?

So I didn't read some article about how Global Warming is maybe bullshit, but if I had I would have probably read about how Global Warming is maybe bullshit. First and foremost, I think that if you are going to jump in with the "Global Warming is not manmade" crowd, you should pause and think if you really want to be in the company of Sarah 'not as hot as Tina Fey, no matter what anyone says' Palin and George 'Double-Yew' Bush. If the answer is yes, then gfy, you can go diaf for all I care. The real issue here, as far as I'm concerned, is whether or not you think we oughta be taking better care of the earth. Not to sound like a hippie, but we really oughta be. The place is a mess, species are going extinct, and the quality of life is rapidly declining. Let's say global warming is a myth. If we, as a society, gather together and cooperate to lower carbon emissions, drive electric cars or whatever, recycle, stop dumping shit in the ocean, whatever, what bad shit will happen? Our air is cleaner, we use renewable sources (I defy anyone to argue taht we're not running the hell out of oil) and we generally have a planet that is a nicer place to be.

Where's the fucking harm?

This would be epic win for society, showing that we can cooperate on something that isn't a war. It reminds me of this time my parents were gonna come visit my apartment. I spent all day cleaning up and vacuming and throwing out old food. Then they called up and cancelled and my immediate reaction was like what the hell, I wasted my whole day. But then I was like, well, on the plus side, now my place is all clean. See what I mean? Epic win for me. Plus, this means that the world will be a much nicer place when the Large Hadron Collider destroys it in a few months.

TL;DR-- Even if Global Warming were bullshit, which it is NOT, we need to stop fucking trashing the place.

If the TL;DR was TL;DR-- FUCK YOU!

Dear Bill Murray, Please Come to My Next Party

Okay, so I broke my longstanding habit of not reading full articles to read an amazing article about my fucking hero Barack Obama Bill Murray, star of every movie I retroactively loved from the 1980's, and one of my all-time favorite Christmas movies.

Well, according to a totally interesting article in the usually shitty NY Post, Bill Murray is apparently now crashing parties, apparently for the lulz.

This is great news. I understand that not everyone will be as moved as I am to read this epic article, but basically, the recently divorced ghostbuster/ international mega star is now spending his nights attending random parties and talking to strangers at bars. We're not talking random parties in the sense of random Hollywood parties. In the article, it talks about him showing up at some crappy house party at some crappy apartment in the middle of NYC, the crappiest place in the world (EAT IT NY-- LA FUCKING RULES!!!!1!1!!!one) hahaha disregard that, I suck cocks, New York is actually pretty okay Fuck New York.

(In related news, I just found out how to use strikethrough)

Anyway, so basically, one of my greatest heroes is apparently now just raging with strangers of my generation. The article seems to indicate that he's doing it mainly to pick up chicks, but I feel like this is not the case, since if he were looking to meet new babes, he'd probably just reenlist in the army and meet some saucy MP's. I like to think that the old guy is just looking for a good time, of the non load-busting variety. So, in the spirt of that, I would like to invite Bill Murray to attend a party at my apartment next semester. We will schedule it around his busy... schedule. Bill Murray, please message me privately so we can set this up. This would be the greatest Celebrity moment of my life, even better than seeing Neil Patrick Harris at some art show in Culver City. Please note that Bill Murray is now my most under-used tag, so I will try and incorporate more BM (Bowel Movement?) themed posts in future.

Culture: Whatever, I dig Kanye

So I read part of some article about what an arrogant douche Kanye West is and I gotta say, who cares?

Kanye's not my favorite rapper, that would have to be Immortal Technique, matter of fact, Kanye isn't even my favorite mainstream rapper, (Jay-Z) but he's pretty solid and he's distinctive from the other 90% of rap which, like 90% of all music is utter garbage. Kanye and I have a lot in common: We're both young wunderkinds in field, and we both appreciate women who "got more ass than the models." Thus, when I see me friend and colleauge being hated on in the Media (pronounced Mee-juh) I feel that it is my perogative to step in.

Anyway, the way I see, it's pretty much nbd that Kanye west thinks he's such hot shit. I mean, you can look at the transverse property and see him as saying he's bigger than the beatles when lennon said the beatles were bigger than Jesus, so therefore Kanye thinks he's bigger than Jesus but the reality is, who gives a shit. Everyone thinks they're better than everyone else. Prove me wrong.

The music you choose to listen to is based on your mood, and when you put on a song in which Kanye West is rapping about what a badass he is, it isn't because you feel like listening to some braggadocio talk about how rad he is, it's because you feel like a badass.

Generally, people listening to music put themselves in place of the I in the song, not the you. When you listen to Tom Petty sing, "I won't back down," you are thinking that you, the listener will not back down, not marveling on the steadfast Mr. Petty. So too in rap. When Kanye raps, "there's a thousand you's, there's only one of me/ so how the hell could you front on me" (excellent use of rhyming me with me, btw), you don't think of yourself as one of the thousand "you's" but rather as the primary "me."

The fact that this arrogance moves from his songs to his personal life is irrelevant-- it's just part of the show. This shit goes for everyone. I think it was hugely disappointing when John Lennon retracted or clarified his statement about being bigger than Jesus. If I were him, I would've just gone with it and been like, "No, yeah, I personally am more important than Jesus Christ, and those who worship HIM as their risen Lord and saviour (he was from England so he woulda spelled it that way) should begin worshiping me instead."

TL;DR-- leeeeeeeeeeeeeeave Kanye alooooooooooone

Gut Reactions: The Big 3 Bailout

Moar like the Big 3 Fail It, Am I right? Yes, I am right, and it's time for another round of Gut Reactions. This time, we'll be talking about the Big 3 Automakers who are asking for like 34 Billion Dollars to fix their broke ass companies. Now, as I recently told the tow-truck driver and my mechanic, I don't know shit about cars, nor do I really know shit about business. I'm watching C-Span right now, seeing a bunch of asshole senators and a bunch of asshole automakers jerking eachother off. Fuck that, here's my five point plan for the US Auto Industry

1. Give them the money-- this keeps jobs in America, and can help bolster consumer confidence
2. Temporarily nationalize the industries-- If they're getting our money, we're in charge.
3. Cut CEO Salaries-- You don't deserve millions of dollars a year if you're fucking up
4. Force the US auto industry to make only electric and plug-in hybrid cars, or at the very least to massively upgrade their gas mileage-- you can't sell shit without a unique selling proposition, in this case, you can lean on the government's support to bring a cheap all electric car to the marketplace, and that shit will sell like gangbusters, meaning
   
5. Only lift the oversight board, the temporary nationalization when the $34 billion is paid back with interest.

TL;DR: Use that $34 billion dollars to make America a nation of electric cars.

The Simple Things in Life

I've sipped hundred dollar champagne, eaten fine Prime Rib, hobnobbed with the stars high atop the roofs of Beverly Hills. I've traveled across this land, and visited the offices of higher learning, been told by great scholars that my prose is among the best. I've walked the halls of California's greatest ad agencies as an equal, seen my work produced by billion dollar companies. I've heard crowds cheer me on as a champion athlete, scoring one for the home team. I've looked deep into the eyes of the woman I love, and seen that love, and profound longing reflected back at me, held her in my arms, stared up at a sky full of stars, and contemplated the infinite potential of man. I've stood atop mountain peaks, dwelt deep in forests, relying on myself and finding myself worthy. I have had, in quiet and reflective moments, read the works of great authors, and understood them as if they were my own. I have seen seen respect and wonder in the eyes of a child, and drunk and laughed with commoners and captains of industry. Once I saw Neil Patrick Harris at a party in Culver City. I have known the best life has to offer, and yet, there is nothing quite like popping a really spectacular zit.

Steez: Threadless

Okay, This is officially my last broad steez topic. After this I'm gonna be going through my wardrobe item by item listing shit I like. This is a really good one, and I'm excited to be writing about it.
Threadless is a dank as fuck website where aspiring art n00bs post up shirt designs and they are voted upon and the cream of the crop are produced. Sounds totally stupid right? Actually not the case. Threadless does a lot of innovative stuff using puff ink, glow in the dark, shiny gold ink, all kinds of crazy shit. They rose to prominence a few years ago, propelled largely by their ever popular, ever-present 'Communist Party' (you'll know it when you see it) shirt. I have that shirt, and wear it mainly because I look good in red. Actually, I have about 10 shirts from them and all of 'em have yielded some positve reactions, thus I am rating this as shit that will get you fucked.

The shirts are distinctive, limited run (so you feel like one in a thousand, not like one in ten) and all in all pretty cheap. I have been thinking off and on and on and off for the past year or so that my T-shirt wearing days are coming to an end, and that may be the case, but I always think I'll have a place for better lookin' threadless numbers. The "Select" shirts are a little bit pricier but some of them are brilliant. The "Type" Tees are universally horrible and should be avoided at all costs. I donno, something about shirts with ironic slogans on them just rubs me the wrong way. When I hear a great joke, I can't wait to tell it maybe once or twice to the few people who really appreciate it. Wearing a slogan shirt is like commiting to one joke that you'll be telling everyone all day everytime you wear the shirt. Whenever you make eye contact with a stranger it's like you're waiting for a laugh. Fuck that shit. This coming from a guy who owns a shirt with a picture of Shakespeare reading "Prose before Ho's, but I digress...

Still, I like threadless. More wearable than T-shirtHell.com, more soul than BustedTees, and cheaper than Detroit Sprinkles, Threadless has a little something special that feels organic. It's like what shopping in Whole Foods would feel like if there were only like 20 Whole Foods and you got the impression that maybe the owners knew what was going on in every store and the little touches had some thought in them, or as much thought as they can in a chain of 20 stores, which is a lot more than in the five hundred stores.

Why, in a previous post about my dank clae shooz, I posted a drawing of myself wearing a threadless shirt, so clearly I must think they're pretty ballin if I'm drawin 'em. Looking through my self portrait collection, I find several other examples of threadless shirts, like the one above. Every three months, they put out a shirt that I pretty much need, at least at the time, so I advise you to get on the mailing list, start looking, start voting on shirts, and start upping your shirt game.

Speaking of the Game, you just lost it.

Culture: The Internet is Terrible

I fucking love the Internet is terrible. I stumbled upon it last year on facebook by accident and have never looked back. Basically, it collects some of the worst shit on the internet and puts it all on one place. The author, 'Raisins', draws heavily from the chans, (which I may discuss later) and youtube and the results are great. 4chan is a little bit much to sift through, so I rely heavily on the internet is terrible when I need to find some quality weird shit to send to my friends and associates. Noted asshole, Freddy Nietzsche once said "Battle not with monsters, lest ye become a monster, and if you gaze into the abyss, the abyss gazes also into you," and Raisins has a simmilar quote "Sometimes the Internet changes a man." You can tell, from the contempt he clearly has for his subjects, that the dude spends a lot of time sifting through crap. I love it. Sometimes, when he posts images of disableds, I cringe a little, but mostly its lulz.

Props to you Raisins, for consistent win. Double props for censoring some of the more extreme stuff so I can surf at work. Five stars.

Gut Reaction: IFH the WSJ

The Wall Stree Journal sucks cock-- prove me wrong.

Ridiculous right wing opinion columns.
Publishing articles by that fucking criminal Karl Rove.
Being assholes, blaming the poor.
Hating on my fucking Hero Barack Obama
I fucking hate the Wall Street Journal

It has excellent articles on business and economics matters, which are two examples of shit I know nothing about. It should stick to this and STFU about politics, which is one example of shit they know nothing about.

TL;DR-- More like Ball Skeet Journal, Am I right?

Culture: Conor Harrington

I'll be the first to know I don't dick about art, but, as the cliche goes, I may not know art, but I know what's dank as fuck, and the paintings of Conor Harrington are dank as fucking fuck.

Since I don't know anything about art, I won't waste your time trying to pretend like I do, instead I'll waste your time with opinions. I first read about Harrington in Swindle, Shepard Fairey's monthly, (see how I just made myself look cultural by just acting like I just assumed you'd know who Shepard Fairey is-- that's an important part of looking cultural). I was immediately blown away by the amazing imagery. Anyway, here's more sweet stuff, hope you dig it.

Steez: Detroit Sprinkles

Okay, so I feel like I shot my wad pretty early with those Clae Shoes. I mean, Steez is in the name of the blog, and yet I don't have much else in the way of epic steez. Therefore, I bring to you some other Stylish Steez: Detroit Sprinkles. I heard about this from a buddy of mine who I guess co-owns the place, and my guess is it's going to be blowing up any second now.

I went to some art show that I may or may not be posting about soon under the heading of Culture, since that's the most cultural shit I've done in weeks, and I basically saw hipsters as far as eye could see. I was dressed like a cross between a total asskicker and a total douche, which I guess is sort of the way to do. As my roommate commented, if we'd of had horn rim glasses we woulda fit right in. Basically, this just hammered home for me the fact that semi-ironic shirts are the way to go.

The close (deliberate, trust me) are pretty baller, and while I don't own any because I am officially out of cash, I feel qualified to inform you that you oughta. What separates these from any other shirts? I donno. Who cares? Nobody. They're probably sort of pricey, but you're probably paying for quality, or integrity, or some other intangible shit. Basically, you're paying extra so that when you go out trying to be hip and steezy, you'll be certain that nobody else is gonna be rocking the same baller shirt, and that they'll all be eyein' you up thinkin how fresh your threads is.

Gut Reaction: Whatever, Fuck That Guy

So science has released a composite image of the most trustworthy face, based on some shit nobody cares about. Now, I'll admit I was hard pressed to barely read the article this time, as it was only like two sentences, but I looked at the guy, and I can emphatically state "Whatever, fuck that guy."

First off, let's get the obvious out of the way-- he's a white dude, which probably makes this racist. Second, , he's just a typical, forgettable, vanilla motherfucker who you'd only trust because you'd totally forget him after you part ways. Also, he kind of reminds me of my old ID badge for my last gig.

If I owned a newspaper, and it had a science section, every line of print would be devoted to real science, and right now that means the Large Hadron Collider, which apparently is some epic particle collider that will either turn men into gods, spin straw into gold, and enhance our understanding of the Universe, or else destroy everything ever. I don't really understand even the broad strokes of this issue, but I think that my unfounded, unreasonable, and ill-informed fears need to be constantly addressed by all media outlets so that I can subsequently ignore the articles and do my Sudoku. Instead, SCIENCE is busily at work on more silly made-up bullshit that even I don't care about.

See, this is great, now I'm all worked up, whereas in reality I could give a shit.

TL:DR-- Whatever, fuck Science, and fuck that guy, and fuck everything since the LHC is gonna fuck all our shit up.

Culture: Changeling Was Rad, But Long

I went out for a hot date with that broad I get around with to go and see Changeling. Directed by that asskicker Clint Eastwood, it stars that hot broad with the pouty face. Basically, her kid gets nabbed and then the police show up with some other kid and say it's hers. She get's pissed off and lulz ensue. There's some intense shit with an ax, a trial scene, shock therapy, negative portrayls of the Irish. It's got it all.

Normally I think Jolie's a pretty so-so actress, but this time I thought she was pretty dope. I read some article in AV Club like a year ago saying she oughta give up on the whole acting gig, since she's so famous and so distinctive she's always playing herself. I was pretty much taken in by the whole thing though, and I thought she did a great job making me forget that she's actually some hot broad who's into tattoos and kinky sex.

The movie was a bummer and way intense, which means I have am going to label it as "shit that will not get you fucked." It also went on for two fucking years, which sucked. It was kind of like Zodiac, in that I kept thinking it was about to end, only to be stuck with another act. That said, it didn't feel bloated; everything seemed necessary. Visually it was really rad looking, and being that I love me some LA, I very much enjoyed seeing the old timey LA. Plus, it showed what assholes cops are, especially the notoriously douchey LAPD. On the other hand, they were pretty hard on the 'changeling' which is sort of weak. I feel like they made no effort to make the kid sympathetic, and I think it's a bold choice as a director to villify a small child. Overall though, if you've got a heart, you'll come out of the story wanting to call your mom. Which reminds me, I'm not in love with the title, since my darling Ma used to call me a changeling when I was misbehaving as a child. Okay, just give me a second to repress that memory... okay done. Anyway, the movie was really sweet and intense, but also really long.

TL;DR-- Changeling was pretty solid, but felt maybe 35 minutes too long.


PS, It also reminded me of this epic book I had to read Freshman year called City of Quartz by Mike Davis. I wasn't as brilliant as I now am, and I was also a little bit of a republican tool in my younger days, so I didn't really appreciate it at the time but it was probably pretty epic and worth a read. It's basically all about how much LA sucks, which I don't agree with but it was certainly an interesting and class conscious look at the history and culture of Los Angeles.

Steez: Clae Shooz

Also, since this blog is ostensibly about steez, I think I'll share my steeziest steez, and then never return to the topic again.

Cousteau, like Jacques (they're boat shoes-- get it?), are an epic set of shoes from an epic company of shoes, Clae. I read about them over the summer and was given a pair by that broad I get around with and who now, in a fit of hypocrisy, mocks me when I wear them. Still, they're epic as shit, and make me feel like a true fucking player whenever I gad about in them. They're not the most comfortable things in the world, but that's because I'd a dude, so I'm used to wearing vans all day. They're probs about as comfortable as a standard pair of like fancy shoes or whatever. Anyway, like I said, I feel like a million fucking bucks when I wear em:



Translation: you wouldn't want to wear them if you were walking a couple miles, they're more like what you'd want to leave as part of a trail of clothes to some hot broad's bed, becuase she saw your epic taste in sneaks and immediately wanted to jump your bone.

TL:DR-- wear these shoes, get laid.

Gut Reactions: Al Gore, What A Douche

Alright, so Gut Reactions are where, without reading or really thinking about an article or issue, I form an opinion based on a headline or summary, and then blog that sucker to death.

Here's an article from the Washington Times, which I won't lie, I found on Fark about Al Gore, who I normally think is pretty rad, especially after seeing that horror movie. My fucking hero Barack Obama offers Al Gore the sweet and, as yet, completely made-up White House position of Climate Czar, and Al Gore says no. I don't know if Al Gore gave a reason, that shit was below the fold so I didn't read it. In my mind, what probably happened is that he think he's hot shit and so when he was offered the gig he was probably all like "Fuck that I'm Al Gore."

Al Gore, what a douche.

So until next time, remember...